(A love letter to the overachievers — including me.)
There’s a very specific type of person(s) I work with.
They’re the ones who say, “I’ve got it,” before anyone else can volunteer.
They’re the ones fixing the spreadsheet at 9:47 p.m.
They’re the ones rewriting the scope at midnight because “it could be better.”
They carry two roles… sometimes three… paid for one and still ask, “Is this okay?”
For the longest time, I thought I was just observing them.
Then I realized — I am them.
The Grit We’re So Proud Of
I work with people who have grit. The kind that’s admirable. The kind leaders casually label as “dependable” and “go-to.”
We grind to prove ourselves.
We grind for recognition.
We grind because we care.
But if I’m being honest?
Sometimes I grind because I’m afraid.
Afraid of not being “enough.”
Afraid that if I stop carrying everything, someone will notice I’m not superhuman.
I’ve watched my coworkers take on more than they need to — and felt protective of them.
Then I caught myself doing the same thing.
Volunteering for one more task.
Absorbing one more responsibility.
Fixing what technically wasn’t mine to fix.
Carrying the work. Carrying the team.
And when feedback comes, it isn’t, “You held this together.”
It’s, “Next time, can you…”
That’s when the doubt creeps in.
For them.
For me.
The Question That Won’t Leave Us Alone
There’s a quiet question that sits in the back of my mind:
When will it ever be enough?
Is “enough”:
- Losing sleep?
- Checking messages before your eyes fully open?
- Constantly trying to impress the person whose approval feels just out of reach?
- Becoming indispensable so you can’t be ignored?
I used to think if I just worked harder, I’d feel secure.
But I’ve worked harder.
And somehow, the bar just moves.
Recognition Shouldn’t Cost Us Our Sanity
Wanting recognition is human.
We want to be seen.
We want our effort acknowledged.
We want our growth to be noticed.
So I try to say it out loud to the people around me:
- “You carried that.”
- “That worked because of you.”
- “Your effort doesn’t go unnoticed.”
- “You deserve more.”
But here’s the uncomfortable part:
I’m better at saying it to them than I am to myself.
I can see their brilliance clearly.
Mine? I minimize it.
I’ll advocate for their promotions.
I’ll defend their contributions in meetings.
But when it comes to me, I’ll think, I just got lucky.
From the Outside Looking In — At Them and At Me
When I look at my coworkers, I see:
Intelligence.
Resilience.
Emotional labor that isn’t even in the job description.
Leadership without the title.
Impact far beyond the paycheck.
And if I’m brave enough to turn that same lens inward?
I have to admit — some of that applies to me too.
That’s the part I’m still learning to accept.
We are worth more than what we’re currently getting paid.
We are worth more than what we’re about to get paid.
We are worth more than a workplace that makes us question our value.
Not because we overwork.
Not because we people-please.
Not because someone finally approves of us.
But because of our character. Our integrity. Our effort. Our heart.
And none of that requires self-exhaustion to be valid.
Maybe “Enough” Is the Wrong Goal
Maybe the goal isn’t to finally reach “enough.”
Maybe the better questions are:
- Am I being respected?
- Am I growing?
- Am I sacrificing too much of myself for validation?
Because a career should elevate you — not erode you.
And I’m realizing something that feels both freeing and terrifying:
If I don’t believe I’m enough now, no promotion will fix that.
No title.
No raise.
No LinkedIn announcement.
Worth isn’t unlocked after burnout.
It’s acknowledged.
To the Ones Who Truly Try (Including Me)
My heart goes out to you.
The ones who prepare more than anyone knows.
Who care more than anyone sees.
Who give their best and still wonder if it’s enough.
I see you.
And I’ll keep reminding you.
And maybe, gently…
Start reminding myself.
beingjtran 